I am currently in the process of moving to a new city and the entire process is full of emotion, frustration and energy zapping. As I was working through my my e-mails and the internet this morning I came across this article, which has allot of good advise for those of you who are experencing the same difficulties ... hope it is helpful.
Ariane de Bonvoisin is the author of The First 30 Days and the founder of first30days.com, a Website dedicated to helping you navigate any life change. Log on for advice and to connect with others who are making transitions.
Why is moving to a new place so fraught with emotion?
There's a fear of the unknown and doubt as to whether you've made the right choice. And there's a sense of closure - every move brings completion to a chapter in your life, so take time to reflect on the experiences you've had and be grateful for the people you've met. Also, you'll feel excitement in trying new things, meeting new people, and having new opportunities. It's as if life has given you a blank slate to start fresh, so find the joy in that possibility.
How can I make moving easier?
Instead of tackling everything at once - and feeling totally overwhelmed - set small goals and reward yourself when you complete each task. Celebrating successes reenergizes you to keep at it - and ensures that packing doesn't take over your life.
The toughest part of a move is leaving people you love. My family lives in Europe, and I live here, so we've created a system. I'll text them if I'm on the train, e-mail them about a great concert I saw, or Skype with my nieces and nephews to see how they're growing. Keeping one another updated on life's big and small moments helps love flow.
How can I make new friends without appearing desperate?
Focus on doing what you love, whether that means taking a yoga class or volunteering at a shelter - it'll help you meet like-minded people and keep you occupied with activities you enjoy. And savor any alone time: Rent movies, write in a journal, or do whatever nurtures your soul. Soon enough, someone or something else will start filling up your time. Life has a natural way of unfolding - and you will eventually meet everyone who should be in yours.
What mistakes do people make when they move to a new city, and how can I avoid them?
Some people set too-high expectations: You're not going to get invited to the greatest party in town on your first day. Other people think they're going to love their new city immediately, but it takes time to form a relationship with a place. To adjust, stick to the schedule that works for you, whether that means reading in the local café on Saturday mornings or grocery shopping on Sunday nights. The quicker you put your normal routines into place, the sooner you'll feel comfortable. And give yourself credit for following through with your decision to move. You jumped in and took a risk; you'll make mistakes along the way, but on the other side, you'll find self-esteem and a new inner strength.
Setting Down New Roots: Top 5 Steps to Take
1. Make a plan. Create a checklist for everything that needs to get done - from packing to canceling utilities.
2. Say good-bye. Don't avoid discussing the move with your circle. Sharing your excitement and reservations will make this change easier for all of you.
3. Get the lay of the land. Before you move, buy a map and a travel book that tells you all about your new state or city. Once there, take a leisurely drive or walk to locate your neighborhood post office, dry cleaner, grocery store, and pharmacy.
4. Psych yourself up. Think of the move as an adventure. Appreciate each new discovery, from an out-of-the-way art-house movie theater to a great Thai take-out place.
5. Be patient. Settling in takes time, so go easy on yourself and let your new life evolve on its own. Little by little, all will fall into place.-Nicole Yorio
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